Untouched
by If Only Cacti Could Fly
Summary: Itachi goes back to teach at his old high school, but after a mysterious accident, doesn't remember the man he once loved, but he's not the only one with problems, they are all going through their own personal Hell. AU. PeinIta. HidaDei. And many more.
1. Chapter One

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Naruto or any of the characters, they all belong to Masashi Kishimoto, but if I did own them, all of the female characters would be killed off almost immediately and it would be one big yaoi-palooza.

**Warning: **Contains yaoi, and probably some kind of possibly offensive material. A substantial amount of Konan bashing as well.

**Important: **This is an Alternate Universe fanfiction, set in basically this time period. And just to clarify two things, one: they are all high school teachers and two: all of the Akatsuki are under my control and they probably won't be 100% normal, I haven't master the in character talent yet.

**This is named after the song "Untouched" by The Veronicas, my cousin showed me the song, and I thought it would be a great title. Every thought I'm not so fond of the song itself.**

I also thought it would be helpful to give the ages of the Akatsuki:

**Itachi: **23

**Deidara:** 25

**Kisame: **29

**Hidan: **26

**Kakuzu: **35

**Sasori: **27

**Pein: **38

**Zetsu: **28

**Konan: **35

Well, without further adieu, I would like to give you the first chapter!

**-x-**

Itachi sat on the air plane, ecstatic after all of this time, that he's finally going to go back home and leave all of this bitter past behind him for good. He shuddered slightly just thinking of it. He'd finally graduated college, and not a moment too soon.

Uchiha Itachi. He's just shy of 23, fresh out of college, going home to start his new teaching job in his old high school as the new chemistry teacher, but most of all that he wanted to see all of his friends. He hadn't seem them in four years, when he left for college Pein was the only one dating anyone, Konan, the secretary, bitchy, obnoxious, and stupid as all hell secretary. Itachi wondered if all his friends changed as much as he had over the time he was gone. He would have kept thinking, but a scratchy voice went on the loud speaker.

"We are about to land in Amegakure, the weather is pretty bad, and we may hit some turbulence, please make sure you are not getting up during this time, and your seat belt is fastened."

With that, Itachi tried not to panic. He never liked planes, ever since the plane to college. He shuddered at the thought, suppressing the memory; he didn't want to think of that today when so many positive things would be happening _'If we don't get killed on the way down…' _

He encouraged himself not to think like that, and tried think of the reunion he'd have with he friends _when _the plane safely landed.

**-x-**

On the ground, in the air port, Deidara, Hidan, Kisame and Kakuzu awaited the arrivals of the youngest of them to exit the plane and meet them.

Hidan, not being able to not say something nasty about someone, had to speak up while they were waiting for the Uchiha to arrive.

"Do you think his is still going to be a fucking freak?" He wondered out loud, Deidara, who was his one of his two absolute best friends all through grade school and high school (the other one being Kisame), cocked his head.

"What do you mean, un?"

"I mean, is he still going to wear black fucking baggy clothes, be a four and a half foot tall midget, and gawk over the fucking principal all the damn time?" With that Deidara huffed, sure, Itachi was strange in high school, he never talked, wore very baggy clothes, didn't sleep much so he had big lines under his eyes, his hair was always a mess, just like every else that he did was, when he went for college he only was about four feet eleven inches, (the second shortest one was him, and he now stands five nine, including his pony tail.) and he was, madly in love with the principal, Pein, who was _**never **_fond of him, he wanted less than nothing to do with him.

But Deidara was very confident about Itachi coming back and being a completely different and redefined person… Well… It had to happen sooner or later… Didn't it?.

Suddenly a loud voice came on the loud speaker.

"Flight 210 has landed, Flight 210 has landed."

"That's Itachi's flight number." Kisame said getting up and stretching, now _he _made Itachi look short.

Hoshigaki Kisame. 29. He's a whooping seven feet, and he tattooed himself completely blue when he was fourteen, which is a somewhat odd, and it makes him look like a shark, but everyone who gets over the initial shock, can tell what a good natured person he really is.

They all got up and waited for Itachi, but he never came…

They started to get a little worried about him, what could have happened to him? Was the question on everyone's mind, but Hidan, who can't stand silence in any way, shape, or form had to put his two cents in.

"Hey, he could just be too short and he can't see him over the luggage claim?" Deidara rolled his eyes along with everyone else.

Bored.

Hidan said something again.

"Maybe Itachi killed himself, and never actually got on the flight." Everyone ignored him except for someone who said in a chipper/calm voice dripping with curiosity,

"Am I really that bad?"

Everyone snapped their heads around, and instantly peered downwards as if to see a two foot tall Itachi doll (I like that rhyme) but all of their anxious eyes saw were a pair of knees, in a tight pair of jeans, as they scanned upwards they saw a tight black shirt and a loose fitting jacket, a black beat up old small messenger bag that was Itachi's signature accessory, on his neck they saw a few necklaces one being a peculiar cat collar, that didn't have his name written on the identification tags, along with two other stray necklaces, and they, still scanning him over, mouths agape like fools, drew their eyes to his face, it was more gorgeous than any of them could ever remember, his alabaster skin glowed warmly, and his pure white teeth were showing in a drop dead gorgeous smile, the lines on he face never went away, but they did shrink significantly, and his red eyes radiating an even, warm, and sweet gaze. His hair was no longer messy, it was straight as a board, and looked luxuriously silky, he did grow it out quite a bit, it used to be up to his shoulder blades, now it rested in a very low loose ponytail just below his shoulder blades. And he wasn't four feet tall anymore either, he was a little bit shorter than Deidara, an estimate of about five feet seven inches.

They all stood there, dumbfounded, speechless… Until Hidan spoke up.

"Damn," He said obviously impressed, "You look better than I thought you would." He finished eyeing him over again as if to make sure it wasn't his imagination.

Deidara huffed.

"What me _**meant **_to say was you look great, as always, and we're so happy to have you back, un." He finished giving Itachi a small welcome back hug, no one objected or added anything, they all just kept staring, everyone was thinking about how different he looked, how much… nicer… not Hidan though, his exact thoughts were

'_Fuck, Pein's really going to be sorry for engaging to Konan to get Itachi off of his back now. Hell, now he's going wish the fag was in his bed.'_

**-x-**

I didn't think it was going to be that long, I was going to make it nine hundred words of less, wow, I feel accomplished, I hope you liked it, this is my first Alternate Universe story, and I'm thinking my first lemon too! Yay! Hidan and Deidara Lemon time!

Any way, please review!


	2. Chapter Two

**Disclaimer:** I don't own anything, all belongs to Masashi Kishimoto, we all know the drill.

**Warning: **Contains yaoi, and probably some kind of possibly offensive material. A substantial amount of Konan bashing as well.

Without further Adieu, the second chapter of Untouched!

**-x-**

Pein was in his office, rubbing his temples viciously. He had just been given a lot more work, and he wasn't too pleased about it. On top of that, the gothic dwarf was coming today. He had a job interview, why the hell did they all become teachers? Every last one of them… he thought it was bad before when it was Kakuzu, Hidan, Deidara, Sasori, Zetsu, Konan, and him, but now, it was a depressed midget too?

He hoped he changed over the four years he'd been gone.

He sighed again, this time it turned into an angry growl half way through, why did Deidara insist on having the Uchiha apply for a job at this particular high school? He couldn't care less that the Uchiha was infatuated with him, even though he highly doubted he would be after what he told him last year, he chuckled darkly at the thought.

Sure he had been incredibly cruel to the boy, but he didn't care. Itachi really annoyed him to death, with the way he never talked, he never smiled, he never showed any emotion, he never put any effort into anything, and yet he excelled at basically everything. Sure, Pein was mostly the same way, I guess opposites do attract.

He briefly thought about Konan, sure, her hair was an odd color, and she was naggy and bitchy most of the time, and she could be sultry, in a bad way, and she never shut up or smiled, and she complained ten times more than Hidan does, and she really wasn't all that pretty, and she was an utter slut, and she was a control freak, and her attitude sucked.

At least she, unlike Itachi, had some redeeming qualities, like she usually left you alone, she wasn't bad in bed, she was some what artistic (though Sasori and Deidara put her to shame), and she wasn't at all clingy. Pein wasn't sure he had fallen in love with her, or if even remotely liked her.

He had to be honest with himself, and he sort of laughed, he found it comical that that sole reason he proposed to Konan was that he heard Itachi was done with college and coming back. If the younger male did still have an absurd crush on him, at least he couldn't advance on him…

The orange haired male shook his head, he had to get back to work before the Uchiha and everyone else got here.

**-x-**

The rest of the teachers were all looking at Itachi in amazement as he bounced out the door to the car, luggage in tow, turning heads as he walked out of the revolving door.

Hidan was the first to say something, as always…

"I wonder what Pein's gonna think of this not-so-little happy-go-lucky fucker now."

Which was followed up by him laughing and Deidara smashing his fist over his head in aggravation.

"Hidan! Didn't I tell you not to mention Pein, yeah? What the hell is wrong with you! Can you not remember anything, un?" He yelled at him angrily. Deidara was normally always pissed at Hidan, the two never got along well, let alone at all.

Everyone was so used to them fighting and hating each other no one ever really noticed that whenever Hidan teased the younger blonde how his face would turn a pink color, or when he got to close he would avoid eye contact and push him away, yelling about personal space with a blush plastered on his face. No one noticed that… except for Hidan.

He always did those things just to get a rise out of the younger one. He didn't really care, he wasn't interested in Deidara. It wasn't like he didn't like men… he was bi for a reason, but the Jashinist figured he just liked women better.

'_Hmm… he does look a bit like a girl with that hair… I wonder if he body is girly too?' _

Hidan was snapped out of his thoughts by another brutal fist to the head, courtesy of Deidara. Hidan yelled a curse at the pain that ran through his head to the rest of his body.

It was really a scream of surprise, but Deidara didn't realize that and he suddenly became sweet, mainly because the others had left Deidara to knock Hidan out of his dazed state, and went to help Itachi.

"I'm sorry, un! Are you okay? I didn't know I hit you that hard!" Deidara rambled as he stood on his tippy toes to try to examine Hidan's head only succeeding to touch noises with the silver haired man whose eyebrows were quirked, he was confused by the young male's sudden change in behavior and kind of tense that they were so close in a public place, with people openly staring.

"Deidara, what the fuck are you fucking doing! Get the hell away from me, bastard!" He said irritably while pushing the younger boy away from him.

People were really starting to stare, not that he really cared, but he really wasn't fond of public displays of affection, not that they were dating… actually the very thought of dating disgusted him, and when _Deidara_ was placed into the picture, he was sure he'd throw up.

"Shut up, un! I'm just concerned is all!" The blonde artist pouted crossing his arms.

"Then why the fuck did you hit me in the fucking first place!" Hidan silently yelled at Deidara trying to keep in an attempt to get everyone's eyes in the airport off of them as he grabbed the other blonde and pushed through the revolving doors.

Once they were outside, they both seemingly dismissed the problem. Walking to help with Itachi's bags, though when they got to the others, the bags were safely packed in the car and they were all looking at Itachi strangely… again… Deidara broke free of Hidan's grasp when they got closer, the older male took a mental note of how he only broke contact when they got into seeing distance of the others. Itachi looked up when the two were close to the car.

"What took you guys so long? We've been waiting for you! Come on let's go!" He ended tugging Deidara and Hidan's sleeves like a three year old would to his mother when they got impatient.

They soon got into the car and drove to the high school, only Deidara and Hidan went with him, even though Itachi's best friend was the only one planning on going, Hidan insisted, once he'd saw how Itachi looked, (secretly dying to see Pein's reaction to the new and improved Uchiha) that he was going.

**-x-**

When Itachi stepped out of the car he looked surprised.

Then chuckled to himself.

"What the fuck are you giggling about fag?" Hidan asked as he cut the transmission and stepped out of the car the same time as Deidara.

"Nothing… I was just thinking about how much bigger and ornery the school used to look…" He said chuckling again and ignoring the insult expertly. The three of them walked into the school. Itachi in front of the other two walking at a moderate pace side by side.

They made it to the principal's door, Itachi knocked gingerly.

**-x-**

Pein heard a knock on the other side of the door. He knew who it was… he really didn't want to go through with this… he took a sharp intake of breath and sighed deeply, rubbing his temples a few more times before saying

"Come in!" Loudly.

He looked up when he saw the door swing open, something Itachi would never do, or so he thought. He put his head back to his work only to jerk it back up, whipping his reading glasses off with his hands for a double take when he realized what he had seen the first time…

**-x-**

I finished the second chapter!

Some people might be wondering why I am stressing the fact that Itachi has changed so much… the real reason behind that is that even in the anime and manga, when Itachi was a child, he was gorgeous, and in this, when he was gorgeous, he is now ugly as sin, depressed as all hell, and a midget! Then suddenly four years later he grew a foot taller, has go get 'em look on life, and puts a model to shame.

Anyway, this is the newest chapter, and I can smell Hidan and Deidara romance in the air!


	3. Chapter Three

Disclaimer:** I don't own anything, all belongs to Masashi Kishimoto, we all know the drill.**

**Warning: **Contains yaoi, and probably some kind of possibly offensive material. A substantial amount of Konan bashing as well.

**-x-**

Well, it's been a while, and I still have no clue where I am going to go with this story, but I am determined to finish it!

Without further adieu, the third chapter (I wonder what Pein will think of Itachi?)

**-x-**

Pein gawked slightly, was this really the child he had shot down so many years ago? Was this the same delinquent that had caused so much trouble for him in the past? Was this the child that made him engage to Konan to try to shake? He certainly hoped not…

"And you are?" Pein asked in a very official voice as he stood up and walked over to the dark haired man, who was so beautiful it was almost blinding.

"Uchiha Itachi, I'm here for the teaching job." He said, looking at the man evenly, thinking to himself that he was quite good looking.

Pein gawked again, noticeably this time. It was Itachi, he really didn't know what to say, he knew that Itachi was coming, but he didn't think he was going to need to prepare himself for the Uchiha's entrance.

Itachi didn't notice the man staring though, he didn't really even notice the uncomfortable air in the office either.

Pein just continued to look at the younger man hungrily, while mentally beating the shit out of himself. He couldn't seem to tear his eyes away from the man, and heaven knows how much he didn't want to.

"Are we going to get started?" Itachi asked in a light innocent voice, but all Pein heard was a sultry come hither, he gulped, this was going to be a long interview

**-x-**

"I wonder how Itachi's doing, un…" Deidara spoke pacing back and forth in the room where student's usually wait for the principal to call them into his office.

"Don't worry, I'm sure that he's fucking Pein as we speak." The platinum blonde replied sitting casually in one of the several seats that were pushed neatly against the wall of the peach colored waiting room.

"Shut it Hidan!" The shorter of the two yelled, stopping briefly in front of the older male with his hands on his hips in an aggravated fashion.

"Why do you always say such gross things about other people!" He added throwing his hands over his head in an exasperated fashion.

"Oh," Hidan started getting up and grabbing Deidara's waist, pulling the other blonde closer before he had time to pull away.

"Would you rather have me make dirty comments about you?" He smirked, man handling the other so their noses where only inches apart.

It didn't last long though, Deidara, with a bright blush spread across his cheeks, mumbling as fast as he could in an embarrassed manner trying his best to sound mad and intimidating, broke the contact by shimming out from under the Jashinist's grasp.

As soon as Deidara was free of the teasing embraced, he turned his back to the silver haired man and closed his eyes in a vain attempt to erase the man from his memories, if only temporarily.

But Hidan, not being one to enjoy being forgotten or brushed off that easily, made another move, slithering his muscular arms around and embarrassed man, making him jump backwards, into the embrace.

The shorter man refused to move a muscle, let alone look back instead he tried to tame his burning face without making it obvious.

But the Jashinist didn't stop there, he leant his head down and kissed the exposed neck, smirking as he playfully nipped and licked the skin which grew red. Deidara's knees shook slightly, trying to act as if his sick jokes it didn't phase him, all the while praying that Hidan had no clue he got hot all over when he touched him like this.

But unbeknownst to Deidara, Hidan knew exactly what he was doing and exactly the affect that the it caused. Hidan reluctantly pulled away when he heard the principal's door open.

Too bad Deidara didn't have enough time to recuperate from the **very **close encounter, because when Itachi and Pein walked out of the office, Deidara was still standing with a dark red blush plastered on his tanned face an indescribable look in his eyes.

When Itachi came into view, he had a look of pure jubilance. Pein looked as if he was still recovering from a major shock, which the other two guessed was the case. As soon was Deidara was within grabbing distance of the Uchiha, he wrapped his arms around the slightly taller male firmly and screamed

"I did it!" rather loudly.

Hidan chuckled and walked towards a still embarrassed and currently suffocating Deidara. 

When he got close enough though, Itachi let go of Deidara and latched himself onto Hidan's surprisingly clothed chest.

**-x-**

Itachi was now sitting in the back seat blabbering away, after calming down considerably. 

Deidara in the passenger's seat and Hidan driving eighty miles an hour in a forty miles per hour zone. Everything was as it should be…

"And I have to tell Kisame about this…" He finished with a blinding smile.

"Where are you going to live now anyway? And where did Kisame take your stuff?" Hidan asked looking back at him, not watching the road as he sped through a one way (going the wrong way may I remind you) street.

"Oh. Kisame didn't tell you?" Itachi inquired genuinely curious.

"Why don't you just fucking tell us?" Hidan asked in a tone mocking the red eyed man.

Itachi huffed.

"I'm living in Kisame's apartment." Itachi stated oblivious to Hidan's obvious mocking..

"Where is Kisame living then, un?" The younger blonde asked looking back at Itachi looking slightly worried.

"With me." Itachi answered, highly amused.

Deidara's eye widened temporarily looking at Itachi disbelievingly.

"Are you two _**together**_?" The blue eyed man croaked out not really believing what he asked. Itachi and Kisame had been friends ever since elementary school, to know that 

they were together would be incredibly awkward… for everyone.

Itachi chuckled.

"Are you serious!" The black haired man boomed happily, chuckling turning into full blown laughter.

"Are you fucking insane?" Hidan turned and practically yelled at the younger blonde in total shock, forgetting about driving all together.

"Well, they are living with each other. If I was living with someone I would think that I would at least like them…" Deidara shrugged embarrassed.

"I do like Kisame, just not like that…I don't think I'd ever date him again." Itachi finished expecting both of them to know what he meant.

"YOU AND KISAME _DATED!_" They both shouted disbelievingly at Itachi, turning fully around to see him.

He nodded.

"Why? You didn't know that?" He asked scratching his head while tilting it to the side in question.

"_**NO!**_" They both shouted in unison again, this time glaring at each other as a signal to stop.

"Will you keep your eyes on the road dumbass!" Deidara screamed, grabbing the wheel as they almost hit an innocent old woman trying to cross the street with groceries. 

Hidan brushed him off.

"Well… We did, a long time ago." Itachi said straightening out his jacket and sitting back in his seat, beginning to twirl a piece of his hair.

They both turned back around and sat still, for a long while, until Deidara spoke up, curiosity growing too strong to hold back a question that had popped into his mind.

"When did you guys date anyway?" He tried to sound casual when he asked, but failed.

"When I was fourteen." He stated simply, adding, "Kisame was twenty."

Deidara wanted to ask another question, but weighed the options, as if on cue Hidan asked instead.

"For how long?"

"Hmm… About two years or s-" He replied without hesitation.

"Why did you break up?" Deidara piped in, cutting off the 'so' in Itachi's response.

"Well, we realized that we didn't think of each other that way." Itachi said, obviously getting uncomfortable under the intense questioning.

"How did you fucking figure that one out!" Hidan snorted, having as cocky smirk on his face because he knew the answer, just wanting to torture Itachi.

"Well, umm… We… Uh… Is this really important?" The black haired man asked fidgeting slightly.

"_**YES!**_" Deidara yelled a little too loudly. He then blushed and looked at his feet adding meekly "It's very important…"

"We… Uh, kinda… had… Umm… sex?" He said the last word low and fast..

Hidan smirk turned into a sadistic smile and he felt responsible to tease the twenty-three year old.

"What was that? I didn't hear you clearly." He called out loudly.

Itachi repeated it, again, still in a fast, soft voice.

"I just can't seem to hear you. Speak louder will you?" Hidan said loudly again.

He laughed as he looked in the rear view mirror, seeing Itachi's red eyes glaring at him ferociously.

Itachi repeated it, somewhat louder.

"Sorry, still can't hear you…" Hidan said innocently.

Suddenly, losing his temper Itachi screamed

"_**GOD ALMIGHTY HE FUCKED ME!**_"

**-x-**

Pein sat back in his chair, running his hands through his hair exasperatedly.

How could someone look _so__**good**_ after looking **so…** well… _**bad!**_

After seeing Itachi he couldn't get the child out of his head.

He tried to reason with himself, it was wrong.

Itachi was how old? Like twenty-three, twenty-five. He was now going on thirty-eight.

He was old enough to be the kid's father!

'_Only if you had him when you were very young.'_

'_God! It doesn't matter, what's wrong is wrong!'_

'_He sure liked you five years ago, why wouldn't he like you now?'_

Pein sighed loudly, now he was negotiating with himself?

Great.

The orange haired male wished several times that he hadn't given the Uchiha the job.

But he just couldn't say no to the young man, not only was he over qualified and passed the exam, he passed with flying colors, but Pein really didn't want to send someone like _him_ away.

'_I can't think of a fellow staff member like that!'_

'_Yes you can, you employed him. You're his boss, you can make him do anything you want, __**anything**__.'_

'_That makes it all the more sick!' _

'_You know you'd love to have him do some seriously kinky shit…'_

'_I would never even think of something like that!'_

'_Well, I am your subconscious, so if I am thinking of this, then __**technically**__, you are too.'_

Pein decided to stop talking to the voice in his head, ignoring to all together.

He sighed in defeat, slamming his head on his desk.

**-x-**

Well, I finished this chapter finally! I didn't really like it, thought it was pretty pointless myself, but you tell me what you think about it, okay?

Heh… Pein's talking to himself, Hidan's making passes on Deidara, even though he doesn't know it yet, and Itachi revealed his secret relationship, and the fact he isn't a virgin! Gasp!

I'll try to update soon!

Thanks for reading!


	4. Chapter Four

**Disclaimer:** I don't own anything, all belongs to Masashi Kishimoto, we all know the drill.

**Warning: **Contains yaoi, and probably some kind of possibly offensive material. A substantial amount of Konan bashing as well.

You're probably wondering why I am updating so early, well, I am too…

I have a few really great ideas for the story, I just have to get everyone settled and school started first…

Without further adieu, chapter five.

**-x-**

When Hidan, Deidara, and Itachi got out of the car Kisame was waiting on the front steps of his… _their_ apartment complex.

Kisame gave the raven haired man a questioning look when he saw him blushing embarrassedly.

Hidan got out of the car and laughed at him sadistically.

Deidara just sighed, but everyone knew he secretly found this amusing.

"Hey." Kisame said walking over to them.

They all looked up from getting Itachi's bags from the trunk, except the red eyed man.

Kisame gave a questioning look at the other two as he walked down the steps to help them carry his bags up the twelve flights of stairs, since the elevator was no longer in service.

Hidan just laughed at the look, going back to grabbing bags full of useless stuff, as the Jashinist called it.

**-x-**

Everything was finally up stairs safe and sound.

Many prayers of thanks were said, not only by the Jashin Priest, but by everyone else, that Itachi did not have a lot of material possessions.

Though the ones that he did have were mostly clothes, facial and body products, and as Hidan calls it, make-up, Itachi would say it was toner or something to even out his complexion, but everyone really knew it was make-up.

Itachi put everything in his new room that Kisame had provided for him, but not before he thanked the tattooed man countless times, each time Kisame would roll his eyes and tell him he needed the company.

It was true, Hoshigaki Kisame was a very lonely man.

He only had his fish, but he liked to sleep a lot and never really conversed with anyone.

It was quite depressing…

When Itachi had said that he needed a place to live, Kisame was ecstatic. The blue man was more than happy to let the Uchiha stay with him.

Sure, their previous relationship didn't work out, and they both came to terms with the fact that neither of them had feelings for each other anymore, but that didn't mean they couldn't still live together and be roommates, they got along just fine.

Hidan could almost sense what Kisame was thinking.

And Hidan being… Well… Hidan, he has to do something to liven this boring place up.

No one was doing anything… Deidara and Itachi were being fags in the other room, and him and Kisame were sitting on the couch in his living room.

Boring!

"So, Kisame, I heard you and Itachi had a previous relationship?"

Kisame looked at him, his small eyes widened slightly, looking away and nodding slightly.

"Are you back together?"

Kisame's head snapped back up and his eyes met Hidan's.

"Of course not! Who told you that?"

Hidan chuckled, the tattooed man always got angry and flustered so easily.

"Well, I was just pondering what you were going to when we left."

Kisame's face was priceless, he obviously got the message Hidan was trying to convey.

"I don't know."

Hidan laughed at Kisame's response.

"I think you do and you don't want to tell me." Hidan pushed.

"Well, you thought wrong, as always."

The Jashinist was always so impressed with Kisame's sarcastic comebacks, it's the main reason they have became such great friends over the years.

There was no time to finish the conversation, Deidara exited Itachi's room, with said red eyed man not too far behind.

"Hidan, I have my landlord coming to my apartment and have to get home in fifteen minutes, un." Deidara said sweetly, obviously telling him he needed a ride home.

"So fucking what?"

Hidan always toyed with people, even if it was in the absolute simplest of ways, he just got his kicks that way.

"Can you drive me home?" He asked sheepishly.

"And give me one fucking reason I should?"

The blue eyed man sighed.

"Because you drove us here and my car is getting repaired, yeah."

"Well maybe if you weren't such a sucky driver you wouldn't need a ride home."

"But Hidan!"

Deidara's pleading was one thing no one ever ignored.

His rosy bottom lip stuck out ever so slightly, his brows furrowed sadly, and his eyes glistened with fake tears.

No one could say no to a pouting Deidara.

Not even Konan when she was PMSing.

It was his way of making his students do everything he wanted them to.

"Fine! This is the last fucking time though!"

Hidan say sneering and getting up in a pissed fashion.

It was Kisame's turn to tease.

"How many times have you said that?"

The albino looked at the blue man threateningly.

"Go fuck Itachi!" Was the last thing he said before he walked out the door. Deidara following not too far behind. Feeling somewhat bad for making Hidan leave his friends home two hours earlier than expected. He knew how much Hidan enjoyed spending time talking/torturing his friends.

When they were both in the car Deidara spoke up.

"I really appreciate this."

He said not looking at Hidan, who turned his head to look at Deidara, even though he was suppose to be watching the road.

But Hidan, being Hidan, could not stand a sentimental moment for too long.

"Whatever."

Deidara pressed on though, determined to get it through the albino's thick skull.

"I really do, un! I never really thank you for doing me favors every day, and I wanted you to know that they don't go unnoticed."

The blonde was looking out the window, refusing to meet the Jashinist's gaze.

"I could give a fuck less myself."

Deidara sighed, loudly, purposely.

"What the hell is wrong with you, yeah! Can't anyone say something to you without having you say some smart ass remark back!"

With that, he huffed, not waiting for Hidan's response that never come.

Instead, his grip around the steering wheel got tighter and the car sped faster than the previous eighty miles per hour down the same one-way, again the wrong way, how he managed that was a mystery.

Deidara, after sulking for a few moments, got bored and started to looked out the window, catching something strange on his reflection in the side mirror.

He gaped and got closer to the mirror, he turned his murderous gaze to Hidan.

"_**You gave me a fucking hickey douche!**_" He threw the car manual that was in glove box at the Jashinist.

"You enjoyed it." He laughed, blocking the book, and laughing more.

"No I didn't you asshole, why do you find it necessary to _defile_ me and leave your _mark _to show you were there!"

"It's a conquest isn't it?"

Deidara would have threw something else at him, but instead he screamed and held onto his seat belt for dear life as they narrowly avoided hitting a car that was trying to safely and legally go down the street.

"And you say _**I'm**_ a fucking bad driver, un!"

"There is a difference between reckless driving and fucking bad driving!"

Hidan said screeching to a stop in front of Deidara's apartment complex, with a not to happy landlord in front of the building.

"Thank you, Hidan."

Deidara said quietly, but sincerely as he exited the car and got out listening to his shrieking landlord cursing him for being late.

Hidan sped off before he could say anything else…

Oh… Like the 'Sorry' Deidara was planning to tell him?

**-x-**

Pein's office door was knocked on again.

He looked up as he shouted "Come in!"

The pierced man looked at the red head that just entered his office.

"Yes, Sasori?" He asked, slightly amused.

"I just had a few questions about this paperwork…"

Sasori was quite lost in this place, like Itachi, he was just starting this year, though he had taught at other schools before. Unlike the raven haired male, he never went to school here, nor did he know half of the employees in this very large, complex school he often found himself getting lost in.

He started, but not before he was interrupted by a certain flower obsessed lady's screechy voice.

"Pein!"

Sasori flinched visibly as Konan pushed her way past him in the doorway, coming into Pein's office and plopping herself down on his lap. Kissing him against his will.

"I missed you so much!"

She screamed hugging him, purposely, into her bosom.

"You just saw me three minutes ago."

He replied, though no one could her his muffled voice through Konan's awful, loud, obnoxious voice.

"I'll, umm… Juss, uh… Just… Ahh… Leave?"

As soon as the red head finished his sentence he ran, lucky him.

Pein could only let his thoughts drift back to Itachi as he was being assaulted by the heavy, monstrosity in his lap.

**-x-**

On Sasori's way out he bumped into Kakuzu.

'_Figures…' _Sasori thought.

Kakuzu was the only other teacher Sasori had become acquainted with. More than likely because Kakuzu and him were the only ones, besides the principal, and occasionally Konan to _"bond" _with the principal in his office, that stayed to work over summer vacation.

Kakuzu because he wanted the extra money for working overtime.

Sasori because he was new to the district and didn't have any friends, not to mention he severely **needed **the money from working overtime.

The one thing every teacher in the school knew was that Sasori was broke, they may not know who Sasori was, but they knew that a male by the name of Sasori was broke.

Flat out broke.

He didn't have two nickels to rub against each other on some of his best days, pay day.

Everything he had went to bills, his landlord was an asshole. He made him pay a phenomenal amount of money for rent, plus his electricity was hooked up to the poor red head's, which the landlord made him pay for, not to mention the water, which he was suppose to pay, and everything else that was suppose to be paid for by a landlord, plus any renovations that the house needed.

Sure, Sasori had tried to take his landlord to court, but damn, rich men sure had good lawyers.

And Sasori really couldn't move out of his dingy, dark, decaying, diminutive apartment, simply because he didn't have any extra money or savings he could use to pay for anything else.

He was in quite a predicament.

But the red head, as everyone knew, was a **very **stubborn man. He would rather be killed than receive help, in anything he did.

Sasori greeted Kakuzu with a glance in his direction, Kakuzu did the same.

"Kakuzu, could you answer a question I have about this paperwork?" He asked.

"Why not ask Pein?" Kakuzu countered, not stopping, walking towards Pein's office.

"Because Konan is here today."

With that, Kakuzu stopped dead and walked back over to Sasori.

As if on cue, a couple strange noises began coming from Pein's office.

They both flinched.

"How about those questions?" Kakuzu brought up, trying to shut out the noises.

There was a strangled screaming sound.

"How about in my classroom?" Sasori asked, then just about ran to his classroom, which was, thankfully, far away from his office.

**-x-**

That was the end of this chapter,

I know that there isn't any yaoi romance yet, but be patient, first I want to assess everyone, and get there situations straight, then there will be pure yaoi, and a dead Konan!


	5. Chapter Five

**Disclaimer:** I don't own anything, all belongs to Masashi Kishimoto, we all know the drill.

**Warning: **Contains yaoi, and probably some kind of possibly offensive material..

**-x-**

I know it has been FOREVER! But this is finally the new chapter, oh and I also noticed a lot of spelling and grammar errors in my first few chapters, so I fixed those! I also made a few minor changes to the content, you don't have to go back and read them if you don't want to, but as the story progresses, it may become just a little confusing.

Well, without further adieu, the long awaited fifth chapter!

**-x-**

Itachi was cleaning up the apartment, school was beginning tomorrow and he was getting nervous. Kisame walked into the kitchen which the Uchiha was currently rearranging, as soon as the blue man was through the threshold, the phone began to ring.

Kisame answered it, with a laidback, "Hey"

"Is Itachi home?" The man's voice was silky and held a seductive undertone that he probably wasn't even aware of, but Kisame was.

"Um, yeah, one minute."

"Thank you." It was surprisingly sincere.

"Itachi it's for you." Kisame said as he passed it to the Uchiha.

"Who is it?" He asked his blue house mate.

"No clue."

**-x-**

"Hello?"

"Itachi? It's Sasuke."

"Are you serious? How are you? _Where_ are you!"

"Don't worry Itachi, I'm fine, everything is fine. I'm at a motel in Amegakure." Sasuke began to elaborate on his current situation.

"Do you need somewhere to stay? How are you alive! How did you get my number! How did you end up in Amegakure! Never mind, just wait one minute." Itachi put the phone down and all but ran into Kisame's room.

"Kisame, that's Sasuke!" Itachi said, a tad desperately.

"Okay, why is that important?" The blue man was confused.

"I'll explain later. I know this is sudden, but I may have to move out." Kisame stood up, he didn't want to Uchiha to leave, it was so much nicer having someone else in the apartment.

"Why?"

"Sasuke needs a place to stay."

"And why can't he stay here?"

Itachi was shocked, he didn't want to burden his friend anymore than he already had. "It would be an inconvenience, and it's not a very big apartment."

"It wouldn't bother me one bit, There's a storage room with a few boxes in it, I can put them in the attic and get a futon. There's no need to leave, really, I like the company."

Itachi didn't have time to argue. "Fine, we'll work out the details later, if this is what you want."

Kisame nodded, and Itachi went back to the phone.

"Sasuke, give me the address of the motel, I'm coming to pick you up."

**-x-**

After a loving reunion, well as loving as an Uchiha reunion can get, Itachi drove home with Sasuke and his very sparse amount of belongings.

When Sasuke walked into the apartment he looked around impassively, the eighteen year old, though he did not show it, was extremely relieved to have finally contacted his brother, he didn't think he could stand another night in a motel, with no distractions to stop him from playing that night over and over again in his head.

Kisame, unknowing that Itachi and his brother had come home, walked out of the bathroom with a fluffy white towel barely hanging onto his hips. Sasuke couldn't help taking in the man's every muscle his unique skin, and his rough facial features, raising his shapely eyebrow in the process.

The blue man opened his eyes, which were previously closed, and was shocked to see Itachi home, with who he presumed was Sasuke, but the grown male held scarce resemblance to the thirteen year old he remembered him as.

All the childish features were no where to be found, replaced with a sharp, striking face, alabaster skin covered his body, no longer pubescent, and looked silky to the touch. His dark eyes and dark hair complimented his paleness and both held a mysterious blue hue. He was now taller than his brother, and had an aura of indifference about him that surprised Kisame, when he was young he was a loud, happy child.

The severe personality changes of both Uchiha's was just plain strange and Kisame resolved, in that moment, before he even spoke a word to either of them, still clad in a small towel, that he would figure out what the Hell happened to them, and if Itachi wasn't talking maybe Sasuke would.

**-x-**

Deidara was very hung over, as a ritual to start off the new school year he would get drunk every night for a week.

This was suppose to be his big blow out night the final day he had to get drunk as fuck before having to be a responsible teacher, but he had no one to go out with him. He wasn't about to go to a bar by himself and get drunk alone! There may be some mediocre guy he could hook up with, but the blonde didn't want to leave it up to fate. He called everyone who he usually goes out with, and even a few people he didn't.

As the blonde art teacher sulkily walked around his kitchen, his cell phone began ringing. He jumped for it, not even reading the name, maybe someone's schedule had cleared up?

"Hello?"

"I heard you didn't have anyone to accompany you tonight, mind if I come on-I mean with you." The cocky voice belonged to none other than Hidan.

"**Hell no**! Do you remember what happened last time I got drunk around you!" Deidara cringed at the memory.

"Vividly, and that was the best fucking blow job I ever got." Hidan's smug chuckle pissed the young blonde off.

"Screw you! I'm too hung over to deal with you!"

"You know the best thing for a hang over is more alcohol."

"I know that, dumb ass! That's why I am going to a _**bar**_!"

"But you don't have anyone to go with you."

"So what?"

"You never go to a bar alone."

"Fuck you."

"I'll be at your house in ten minutes."

Deidara slammed his cell phone shut, begrudgingly going to his room to get ready. A plan formulating on his way.

'_If I can't piss him off, maybe I can find another way to get under his skin…'_

He smirked.

**-x-**

When the door bell rang, Deidara answered it and came face to face with Hidan, his shoulder resting him against the frame.

"Give me one minute, I need to get my wallet." Deidara walked over to the side drawer, purposely bending down more than he needed to in his leather pants.

'_Holy fuck'_ Was all the Jashinist processed, as he racked his body up and down, three words described the outfit perfectly.

Revealing. Leather. Sexy.

"Come on." He said as he walked back over to him, cocking his head at the older male. "What?"

Not about to give the other a compliment Hidan walked down to the steps to his car, trying to get the image out of his mind. Nonchalantly saying "You could have put on some fucking clothes. Whore."

The blonde felt his eye twitch, and mentally jumped up and down like a spoiled three year old not getting his way.

'_This is going to be a long night…' _They both thought, sighing on their way to the car.

**-x-**

After a few drinks they both began to lighten up, the tension between them becoming nonexistent. They laughed at poked fun at each other over the loud thumping bass of a popular techno song in a booth in the secluded section of the bar.

By Deidara's eighth drink, he was far past tipsy, but as they fell into silence he began to succumb to boredom.

'_Why not liven things up?'_ He reasoned to himself innocently.

With that he scooted over so his thigh was touching Hidan, who also on his eighth or ninth drink, who had the ability to hold his alcohol much better than the young light weight.

"Are you fucking drunk already?" The Jashinist asked, disappointed in his companion.

"So what if I am?" He whispered huskily getting close to his ear.

Hidan slightly confused, turned to face Deidara, who was very close to him now.

"What the Hell are you doing?" He asked while he back away from the drunk blonde.

"Will you just shut up." Said blonde ground out as he captured the sober man's mouth in a bruising kiss.

The younger man, never breaking the kiss, got onto the other's lap, sloppily putting the large pale hands onto his leather clad ass, and using his own hands to hungrily explore the albino's body.

Hidan smirked into the needy lips, biting down on the bottom one, earning a gasp and entrance, exploring the hot mouth, pulling the drunk blonde closer by his ass.

Deidara broke the kiss, dazed, and went for the pure white expanse of the Jashinist's neck, sucking and biting until it turned red and the other's breath became labored. He moved his hands down to the jeans constricting the sober man's erection. He unzipped them, freeing his cock.

"What a minute Deidara!" He reasoned grabbing the younger man's hand before he could to stroke him. "I think it's about time we leave, we do have school tomorrow you know."

"It's still early." Was all he drawled out as he broke out of Hidan's death grip and began to stroke his pulsing erection.

As the Jashinist concealed a groan, he gathered every bit of willpower he had and picked Deidara up, tossing over his shoulder, walking out of the bar casually as if there wasn't a drunk blonde trying to beat his back bloody.

He'd thank him later.

**-x-**

**Well, next chapter school starts! Plus a little bit of drunk action! Yay! I'll try to update more often, thank for reading! Reviews are appreciated! **


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